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This weeks “Ghetto” Movies served hot from Hollywood.

February 16, 2008

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Let me say that being “ghetto” in the film industry is not seen as being “ghetto.” It is masked as promotion and marketing. What I mean by “ghetto” is the unapologetic, shameless promotion of a film that you know will suck. This is “ghetto.” It is as “ghetto” as stuffing your butt in a pair of jeans two sizes too small. You know it’s not working, but you do it anyhow.

Welcome Home, Roscoe Jenkins- The trailer sucked. The movie stinks, and they still promote it as a comedy. I did laugh at how these people got this movie made and ask “Why don’t I have this kind of cash laying around?”. Yawn. What I hate to do is fall asleep in church but falling asleep on this was a mixed treat. I was happy to sleep but that made me mad because I had to pay for tickets to take a good nap.

Fool’s Gold- It’s like deja vu... The trailer sucked. The movie stinks, and they still promote it as a comedy. I did laugh at how these people got this movie made. Yawn. What I hate to do is fall asleep in church but falling asleep on this was a mixed treat. I was happy to sleep but that made me mad because I had to pay for tickets to take a good nap.

Peeking at Matthew McConaughey’s bare chest was nice, but he’s on his way to the land of Baby’s Daddy and we really don’t want to follow him there because that’s “Ghetto.”

[The real star of the show is the Director, Andy Tennant. Who was this hot little tushy shakin’ dancer in both Grease & Grease 2. Not to mention he played a bumbling goof this wacky little obscure 80’s movie called Midnight Madness, with a then unknown Michael J. Fox]

 

The Eye- Beautiful Jessica Alba is pulling a Sarah Michelle Gellar by flipping from TV to film and now from cartoonish Hero to Horror Heroine in a Asian-to-American remake.

This movie is “ghetto”. Do we really care about “The Eye”. It’s nice that her pretty character can see again, but do something to surprise us besides having “ghetto” looking zombies jump into view. Duh. Been There.

“I spy with both my eyes…” Jessica Alba becoming a “Baby Mama” and that’s ghetto. I’d rather watch Madeline Stowe in a 90’s version of this eye transplant type of film called Blink (1994), without the supernatural silliness.

 

Next: I will tackle to country bumpkin GHETTO TACKINESS of HANNAH MONTANA and how Split Personality should not be encouraged.

 

2 Comments leave one →
  1. Elle permalink
    February 17, 2008 6:52 pm

    You are so right! When I walked into the theater to se Welcome back Roscoe Jenkins I was a proud African-American Woman…..when I walked out I had turned back into a slave –ha ha ….they ripped out everything the civil rights era accomplished. Ok jokes aside..this movie is atrocious and I am embarassed for everyone that was in it, the producer, the writer, the boy who bought the bagels everyday. I am so serious—-people why do we do this to ourselves! Monique I am so disappointed in you…what about Charm school ?

  2. March 2, 2008 2:52 am

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